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How to Do Friendsgiving

by Chris Flight | 1 year ago

Thanksgiving with Friends – easy enough, right?  Do you do the entire turkey, stuffing, sides, pie – the whole shebang?

The general consensus on Friendsgiving is:

  • For those who can’t spend time with family, spend it with friends
  • For those who find the Thanksgiving holiday an opportunity to catch up with friends that live elsewhere or impossible to a hold of.

Obviously, there is no standard definition but I’ve been celebrating “Friendsgiving” for over 12 years so I have some nuggets of experience of how to do it.

First off, I don’t call it Friendsgiving.  To me and my group of friends, this holiday is known as DAT day.  Day After Thanksgiving.  At least this is how it should be if schedules allow and you’re not planning for Black Friday madness (psssst….there are great deals online and this thing called Cyber Monday which now starts on the weekend).

Why the day after?  Well for one, the Turkey’s at any supermarket are just as fresh as Thanksgiving day but are usually purchased at ¼ of the price (if not more).  It’s an opportunity to switch up the dishes or cook the Turkey a different way while enjoying company with your friends.



In many cases, my DAT days have been much more consistent and meaningful than my Thanksgivings.  Why?  Well you have to understand – my friends are my family.  Not a secondary group to my family, but a more culturally diverse extension of it.  They’ve seen the best of me, they’ve seen the worst of me.  They’ve helped me discover the important values in life and build my character.

In one instance, last year I had a back and forth with one of my friends over what was a trivial conversation about television shows, specifically Black Mirror’s San Junipero episode and the mini-series The Night Of.  As we’re both strong-minded to our thoughts and beliefs, the innocent conversation became argumentative and unfortunately hung over us for a little while.  It wasn’t until a separate event weeks later that we talked it out but as I had time to reflect on why our harmless television show chit-chat became a back and forth, I realized it’s because of how close we are.  It was like brothers fighting and as we skipped the pre-adolescence wrestling matches, this was just our way of expressing brotherly love.

I also genuinely think my friends were the biggest reason why I moved back to Los Angeles after attending one year at Syracuse University.  I remember the moment clearly.  It was our first DAT day and I was sporting my newly purchased Syracuse Orange shirt, hat, and more while we enjoyed an amazing Turkey and played Texas Hold’em (because that was the cool thing to do back in 2004).  I had such an amazing time that when it was time to fly back to Snowy Syracuse in a blizzard I said: “Nope.  Not for four years.”.  I would end up cutting out a picture of USC’s Doheny Library with beautiful palm trees, pinning it in front of my desk and setting my sight back to Los Angeles.  Now here I am, still living in California and now raising my own family all because of my friends, my other family.  We also get to enjoy the company of significant others, so our family keeps growing!


I credit my friends for challenging me, encouraging me, supporting me and building me up to who I am today.

If you’re lucky enough to have a group of friends that date back to elementary school or a close enough group to consider your family – then DAT day or “Friendsgiving” should be made a yearly tradition!

Enjoy the turkeys on today Thanksgiving or the day(s) after!